Kitty Tierney, owner of Impressions Salon and Spa in Mequon, Wisconsin: “My Naysayers usually go away. Many of my staff have been with me since they graduated from beauty school. The Naysayers think everything I do is wrong, so eventually they go away.”
Christine Zilinski, owner of Salon Concrete in Red Bank, New Jersey: “I have grown to value this person, but I did not always see it that way. What I’ve discovered is that the Naysayer is a person who has ideas different from your own. They are not always negative, but often someone looking to be heard, for attention and to have an opportunity to communicate their own ideas.
If this person challenges me, I will challenge them back with questions. I go into curiosity mode to get a better understanding of where they are coming from. For example, if someone doesn’t agree with a policy, I come up with powerful questions to find out what the issue is. This person may have great ideas, but they don’t know how to communicate them. If I react to the way they communicate, then we wouldn’t get anywhere. Instead I challenge them to come up with their own ideas.
“One great book to refer to in this scenario is Fierce Conversations by Susan Scott. One of the things that the book recommends is Beach Ball Conversations, which involves identifying the issue, talking about who it is affecting and how it is affecting them to come up with solutions.”